Freedom

I skyped with my mom today and she teared up when she saw me! It's been almost 5 months since I have seen her face-to-face and three weeks since she has even heard my voice. I am feeling extremely blessed to be surrounded by so much love even though I am half a world away from my loved ones. My friends and family have dosed me with ample amounts of love and support that I can carry it in my pocket every where I go.

When I left for Indonesia I wanted to get away and get comfortable with the company of myself again. I've never been one who enjoys alone time. I fill my days with work, outdoors, friends, and relationships that I rarely give myself any time. On the 24 hour trip over here I was sad. I looked at my journal from the first day and I seemed to be frightened, alone, and confused. I questioned my independence and actually thought I may not be in the right head space to travel alone. However, I embraced the decision to tackle this solo mission and it has exceeded all expectations! Here I am three weeks later, knee deep in a new culture and soaking up the differences in lifestyles. I am in awe of the beauty and I listen to the sounds of my surroundings instead of the monkey chatter in my head. I have scuba dived with sharks, turtles, and manta rays. I climbed the highest volcano. I was 10 feet away from the magnificent Komodo dragons. I boated across part of Indonesia sleeping on the boat deck with 13 other people. When I walk around I stop and talk to strangers (even though I was taught not to do that). I have seen a palm reader and a healer. I met an influential yoga teacher who introduced me to aerial silks. I have explored in rice fields, made many new friends from all over the world, and most importantly I have fallen in love with myself all over again.

My mom asked me what my favorite part of the journey has been... not the most beautiful place, or the most memorable beach... the overall journey. I told her it was the freedom. I have never felt more comfortable in my own skin in my entire life. I have to admit I really haven't been alone much. I have made lovely friends along the way, but I have had many quiet moments to myself at night and early in the morning to reflect and think about "things," for lack of better words. We live in a country where we are free. Each and every one of us take this for granted. We can make our own choices, express ourselves in the way we dress, vote, travel, and choose any religion to practice. It hasn't always been that way. We have so much dang freedom yet many of us feel trapped. I heard this the other day and it truly resonated with me... the ship is safe in the harbor, but that's not what ships are made for. I feel free. I am free.